It’s not really about the wardrobe

As I stated in this post, one of the three goals I intend to reach whiting 14th March 2017 is:

  • be a more seductive person

To me, being a seductive person is not really about clothes or makeup, but I thought that starting with clothes and makeup might have worked for me, since a good wardrobe and a well equipped beauty case could increase your self confidence. So I started to read blogs about style. I identified my body shape. I asked the assistance of an expert to find my colour season. I purchased a large sample of peculiar perfumes to better understand how my skin reacts to natural fragrances, since synthetic ones give me headache.

And I am not a bit more seductive. Why?

First, now that I theoretically know what I need, I can’t put myself to buy anything. All that analysis paralyzed me. Besides, sorting out something that flatters me by all its features – colour, texture, shape, style, prize –  among all the different choices that fashion proposes needs a lot of motivation.

Second, seduction does not  comes from self-confidence. Seduction is born from desire. To be seductive, you must desire. You are not seductive just by being at peace and self confident. I believe a buddhist monk in meditation is a person at peace and confident, but not seductive. Not because of his looks, because he does not desire. If you really desire something or someone, you will find the needed confidence to make the first step.

When I was a young lady, I really wanted someone by my side to call mine. From time to time, I was trying to win the love of a specific guy or looking for a new partner. Now that I am in a stable and loving relationship my desire is weak. It might sound strange, but if you don’t believe me, ask some married couples. You share affection, love, time and experiences with your partner. Sometimes seduction falls out of the scenery.

But I am not FINE with that. What can I do? Two things are helping me:

And you? What is your way to be seductive? Meanwhile, thank you for your time.


4 thoughts on “It’s not really about the wardrobe

Add yours

  1. I had to smile when you named the example of the monk 😀 I’m currently in a phase where I’m deciding whether I want clothes and makeup have a bigger importance in my life or not.. I’m still not sure but it was interesting to read that you peeked into it as well!

    Very interesting that meditation helped you. I’m probably going to listen to the TED talk since my desire is often hibernating as well.

    1. I have to tell you, the talk is more about taking action than desire per se, but the speaker sounds honest and is funny. More funny than me and my monk 😜

      1. oh, thanks for the information – I think there was a ted talk about desire in a long-term relationship, I’ll look for it then 😀 and don’t underrate yourself, Nina! 🙂

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